Falling in Love with Food

T.W Eating Disorders 

 

What’s the first thing you think of when I say the word food? ‘Nutrients’, ‘Pizza’, ‘Health’, ‘Chinese’, ‘Restaurants’? For years all I could associate with food was ‘avoid’, ‘calories’ and ‘weight’. Body dysphoria ruined food for me, I couldn’t eat without feeling guilty, as if one biscuit would add a stone on. Skipping meals was an achievement, seeing how long I could go before I passed out was a daily challenge, but I was reaching for an impossible goal. Not eating only made things worse for my mental and physical health. After finally accepting that I wasn’t healthy and I needed to change, eating became a chore. I felt sick every time I ate because it was more than food than my body had been used to for so long.  Life was like this for a long time, until one day I decided I was going to go vegetarian. (Don’t worry this blog is not me trying to persuade you to go vegetarian, before you switch off) My mum was not very impressed with the whole idea and decided to make a beautiful mince lasagne for my first night of vegetarianism. I didn’t have a clue what to make for myself and resulted in having a tin of Heinz tomato soup. My mum is an amazing cook, but she is also Italian and Italian food doesn’t tend to have many veggie options, so I needed to start cooking for myself and trying new foods. 

I was always a very picky eater, my subway order was ham and cheese in the Italian bread, lettuce if I was feeling adventurous. My lunch bag in school consisted of a cheese sandwich and a belvita biscuit, you get the idea. My mum was the biggest help, despite her disagreeing with me going vegetarian she still wanted to make sure I was eating nutritious, and delicious meals. I was able to find the recipes and we cooked them together. Some of the meals we prepared included Vegetarian Lasagnes, Kidney bean and pepper risotto, Chickpea stew and Quorn fajitas. Eating felt less like a chore and I was able to appreciate the skill it took to prepare, I started to think more about flavours, seasoning and sauces. Trying new ingredients and combinations became enticing. I would go to a restaurant and pick whatever vegetarian option they had, no matter what it was, instead of just resorting to chips. In 2021 I moved out of my family home and into my own house, that I shared with my best friend. I had to learn how to do a food shop and cook every day. It became difficult for me to motivate myself to cook a nice dinner when it was just for myself, and I would resort to sandwiches, cereal and super noodles too often. This is one of the problems I know a lot of people who live alone or have recently moved out struggle with. In my next blog, I am going to explain how I cook a simple chicken stir fry. Its quick and easy, has lots of veg and protein, and still tastes great if you microwave leftovers the next day. 

I am no longer a vegetarian and now live in a new house with my boyfriend. Cooking for him has inspired me to learn new recipes, because if I make healthy dinners and look after myself, I will be looking after him too. My page will also consist of meals for two that I have learnt over the years. 

This whole page is about finding recipes for everyone, whether you are struggling to find time for cooking, need new ideas or you just don’t know where to start. This is a judgement free zone. It is all about looking after our bodies and falling in love with food again.